Sunday, 31 May 2015


Broke my PL's mug.
It was her favourite one..

It was a mistake, of course.
I thought it would not fall off the table, if I stick my snout inside.
It did.
I thought, even when it falls, it might not brake.
It did.

My PL is sad and angry with me.

I tried to droop my ears to show I am sorry but it did not cheer her up.
I wagged my tail.
Didn't work either.
I am a guilty dog.
Going to mope on the sofa.

Thursday, 28 May 2015


Our PL is not feeling well.

We, dogs, can sense this.
It is said we have a six sense for it.
And, of course, we feel obliged to do something about it.
It is our dog's duty.

Dotty, for example, looks concerned.
She gives PL a long, deep look and then she crawls to bed with her.

That's alright.
I am not saying it is not a possible way to do it.

Myself, though, I have a different strategy.

The beginning is similar...

...long, meaningful look into the eyes...

...and then you try to bite off PL's hand.

Works every time!
She immediately feels much better.
Success guaranteed!

and THEN a crawl to bed with her!

Wednesday, 27 May 2015

DAY 56: A CONFESSION to start.... do you remember a few days ago when my PL was worried that I am ill?

Well, I am not.

This time I ravished four pouches of dog food.
Dotty´s dog food, to be precise.

And you know what?!

I am not even sorry.
They were delicious.
Much better then the cat ones.

Only I got no dinner.
I will probably die of starvation.

If there is no blog entry tomorrow, you know what happened.

Tuesday, 26 May 2015


I know, you are all imagining me spending my days in sofisticated society.
That I daily meet soft coated wheaten terriers and nova scotia duck tolling retrievers and other cool dogs.
That I attend trendy parties, where I sip coctails and crunch Royal Canine granules, as all other celebrities do...

The truth is much more prosaic.

When my PL comes home and it is pouring down as it is today...

I touch her for some food...

I wash dishes....

I check my blog...

and I go to bed just as any ordinary dog, who is not keeping their own blog :-)

Good night!

Monday, 25 May 2015


Our PL was late home today.

We were a bit nervous, me and Dorotka, since there was a storm outside, lots of lightnings and bangs and we weren't sure if we should guard the house or hide.

In the end we decided to be brave girls and wait for our PL on the window sill.

At last, she came! Got in...and what do you think?

Did she say we were brave?
Was she pleased we guarded the house?
Did she cuddle and pat us?

Well, actually she DID all of that, that's true.

And then she says:

"Jenny, you haven't destroyed or eaten anything? Are you unwell?"

And she checked my nose to see if I have a fever.

See? That happens when a doggie is simply well behaved GOOD DOG!

Sunday, 24 May 2015


My ancestors were wolfs.
The ran free as a wind on empty planes and their tales were waving in the wind.
The howl romantically at the moon.
They were lying at their first human pack leader's feet and warmed themselves at the campfire.

Basically, that's what I still do.

Well, except of the running on wild and empty planes, since my PL won't let me run there on my own.
And except of the wind. I don't like wind. It messes up my fur.
And - of course - minus the romantic howling, since who would spend night howling to the moon, when you can sleep on the sofa inside.

But campfire...camfire, that's different.
Since campfire means WURSTS!!!

My ancestors knew why they joined a human pack.
You can't hunt wursts in the forest.
And wursts are GREAT!

Excuse me, is that wurst free?
Come on, I know there is one for me!
Dotty, behave casually and let's move!

I have to point out that my PL uploaded all the photos on which I am licking my lips, which is very far from reality. In fact, there is also number of photos on which I am staring or drooling uncontrollably!
But we got a wurst each in the end, so I am cool!

Friday, 22 May 2015


It must have been a very wise man, who said that.

Wise and nice. Clever chap. Spot on.
Since he was absolutely and totally right.

MARROW BONE....mmmmmm...

It MIGHT be even better then a tin!

I must write a poem about a marrow bone one day.

Only now I am too busy.


Still chewing.
(He laughs last who chews best!)

More chewing in progress.
(Since nobody can be sad when you have a MARROW BONE!!)



Only I will keep the bone for a few more day. I will lick it and play within and I will be happy.
The marrow bone is a long term project!

Thursday, 21 May 2015


We went to the MICE MEADOW today!

Just when I almost forgot what does it look like there (and when I ALMOST forgot all the commands I was able to react to), we went back there.

To see mices!

There ARE still there!
And they have big new holes, look!!

There were many new things, actually.

Take the buzzers, for example.

They fly from flower to flower, buzz, provoke me and my PL forbids me to catch them.
She says they would give me a jab in my nose and it would swell like a balloon.
Well, my PL would not lie to me. Probably. But still, I am planning to put this to a test.
No luck catching one so far, though. I will keep you posted.

There are flowers on my meadow, too.
Basically a colorfull grass.
My PL wanted to take a photo of me.

First I didn't sit.
My PL told me off.

Then I sat.
ON the flowers.

And was told off again.
Sometimes, it is really difficult to please, I can tell you!

And then I discovered VIOLETS!
Their scent was divine.
Like a rich GRAVY!!!
And they tasted like gravy as well!*
I really like violets, you know.

But the main thing is I was back on MY MEADOW!

I am such a happy dog today!!

*) If you know a better way how to achieve a shot of a dog with her snout buried in a bunch of violets, rather then spray them with gravy, just let me know. 
The Cunning PL.

Wednesday, 20 May 2015


Some of us dogs have a special gift.
They are super dogs.
Like me, for example.

My main super power is telescosnout.

I will have to work on that name a bit.

Anyway, it is simply my telescopic snout, which - in total violation to all laws of nature - is able to extend to reach the places, which could be (and in many cases USED TO BE) considered unreachable.

Unfortunately, one of my PL's super powers is moving the most interesting items (such as FOOD and RUBBISH BINS) just out of the current reach of my telescosnou...snoutosco....out of my reach.

Never mind, I am working on it.

This is the "easy peasy" level. For Dotty this is the "pro" level, of course.

This requires a little more motivation.
Like somebody's dinner left there for 30 seconds, 
while the careless person pops to the kitchen to get some water.

People who visit for the first time sometimes wonder, why is the rubbish bin on the window sill.
I guess you do not wonder, do you?

Levels "Easy Peasy" - "Leftover bread" - "Ham sandwich" - "Out of reach (so far)"
The alternative to the "ham sandwich" level is "to surprise cat by sniffing her bum,
when se least expects it".
Great fun it is!

Only my PL somehow always knows I climbed that high.
No idea, how she does it. She is simply Super PL.

Pozn. The overturned armchair MIGHT be a clue, Jenny. Think about it. Your Super PL.

Tuesday, 19 May 2015


Oh, tin, you are the best thing in the world
When on the sofa holding you I'm curled

My heart is melting completely
As you, tin, smell so sweetly

Let's give you credit where its due
Not all that is gold has to glitter

Your meat is tastier then the CENSORED
Which I love digging from cat's litter

You are simply the bestest of all things
It's such a pleasure that tin brings

It doesn't matter if my rhyme is lame
Without you, tin, my life would never be the same

Monday, 18 May 2015


I mention Dotty every now and then but thinking about it, I have not yet properly introduced her to you.
So, let's fix it: Meet Dorotka

She is actually part of our pack longer then I am but we do not mention that, alright? The important thing is that I am the BOSS.
Well, almost the boss, of course, if we count our PL.
Dorotka is the third on the pack ladder.

Such a scared, worried mouse it was, when our PL got her from the shelter.

There was a wise old Zara in the pack then. For a little while, we were three black dogs there. We could have formed a cool revival band.

Now we are only two and as I said I am the boss. Only my games are sometimes a bit rough and our PL has to remind me occasionally, that I can't roll Dorotka on the floor or tread on her. Of course I only do it when I forget myself. No harm intended.

Dorotka and Zara
After all, Dotty is a little one but my, she can bark! When she puts her heart into it, the windows rattle.

Also, if she was not a part of our pack, I would have nobody to be a boss of. Which would be real shame, since I am so good at it!

I just wish I was also allowed to go to bed with our PL, as Dotty is.
I am very good in bed warming.
And I am excellent in waking people up.

You just stick your snout in their face, lick them and jump a bit on their chests and they are awake in no time.
Well, more like at 3 am.
Which is a very proper time to go outside and bark a bit...when you think of it.

The Pack of Three

Nice game of "I bite you, you bite me, we are happy family".

Dotty may sleep in bed and I DON'T! NO FAIR!

Sunday, 17 May 2015


All is back to normal now.
Except of all the exciting things which happen all the time, of course.

Like today.
I am happily chilling at our Pack Land.

Spring is all around.
Various flowers I mustn't tread on are also all around.
So I tread on them all the same.
Difficult to avoid them when you have four legs.

Sweet little birds and chirping in the bushes. (This is edited version for my PL. The truth is, they are vicious little buggers and if they weren't unjustly advanced by those flyi-flappers, I would have crunched the lot ages ago!)

Anyway, so I am sitting here, having my photos taken, so that you can all see how beautiful and intelligent I am, when...

....suddenly I see something at the corner of my eye...I look closer..couldn't believe it at first, but it is true..THERE IS A DOG IN THE GARDEN NEXT DOOR!!!

On MY next door garden, where nobody ever is.

And what is worse - she looks just like ME?!!

So I barked my head off. Yelled at her with all the decibels I could master.
Dorotka helped as well.
And what do you think?
She yelled at US!
Saying what the hell are we doing on HER next door garden!

Total disgrace!

On top of that, our PLs didn't let us to sort this out nose to nose.
I would have told that moulting carpet of a dog what's what.
Well, I would not tell her, since I do not speak, of course.
But she would have got the message, grrrr!

Actually, I won in the end.
The whole party next door, including that black heckler, had packed up and left.
Just before I manage to dig a big enough hole under the fence.
Never mind, it is there, ready for the next time.

There. There she is! Do you see that insolent expression on her face?!

Saturday, 16 May 2015


Our PL is home!
Our PL is home!!
Our PL is home!!!
Our PL is home!!!

I though maybe there will be some photos from the greeting but folks, it is impossible to make photos, when you must jump and bark and squeak and wag tail and bark and jump and jump and jump, because...

our PL is home!
Our PL is home!!
Our PL is home!!!
Our PL is home!!!

At last!
I am such a happy dog!

Friday, 8 May 2015


Our PL left us!
She left her pack!
Her faithful pack!!

I had my suspicions when I saw her taking out that nasty red thing, she always takes with her, when she goes away.
And she went away.

At least she arranged some company for me and Dorotka.
Monika and Annie will cuddle us and play with us and give us treats and share their dinner with us, if we stare at them really intently.
It is our little secret, since our PL would put a quick stop to it, if only she knew. Which she does not.

So, it is not all that bad.
But is not the same without our Pack Leader.

She said she will be back in a week.
I don't know how long the week is, though. So I will be looking out for her every day.
Maybe a week is the same as tomorrow.


My PL says I should complain less.
And not to write about food all the time.

Well, that's easy to say.
But then I could not tell you, how I burnt my NOSE!

I admit, PL told me.
She was standing by the stove, pouring the soup (FANTASTIC soup, with pieces of BEEF!!!) and she said: "Move aside, Jenny, you will burn your nose."

Well, I did'n move aside.
And I burnt my nose.

I know, it is not the most dramatic story you have ever heard.
But have you ever burnt your nose?!
Well, then.
I did.

Thursday, 7 May 2015


Our PL was late today.
Participation on Grand Openning, she says.

I can understand that.
Grand Opennings are very important events.

I witness several of them daily, and each and every one is GREAT experience!

Take for example the Grand DOOR Openning.
Very important.
Very exciting.

My PL goes to the garden door every morning and OPENS it!
Sure, I have access to the garden all the time, through the small dog-door, but that is not the same.
It just does not compare to that magnificent feeling, when your Pack Leader personally opens the door for you!
It is just like the whole world opened before your eyes!

You need tu RUN OUT like a bullet, hit the door frame, slide on the floor, step on Dorotka´s tail and bark your head of, so that all the cats in the neighborhood know, you are OUT THERE!

Another good example is Grand FOOD TIN Opennning!
The most important of them all.
The best of the best.

You are waiting in the kitchen
Dancing with excitement.
Tounge hanging out.
Drooling like Pavlov´s dog.

You are watching every single PL´s move, not to miss the crucial moment.

And then it comes....POP!!!
The bestest sound in the world.

I just hope the Grand Openning my PL was visiting today just as exciting.
I doubt it, though :-)

Tuesday, 5 May 2015


My PL has still dodgy leg, so we do not go for walkies.

I run around the garden a lot but I am looking forward to chase some mice again sometimes soon.

I do have a complaint, though.
Life is not fair.
It is a dog´s life.
Life is - terrible to say - good only to cats.

Well, the FOOD is, to be precise.
And life and food is basically the same.

Take today, for example.

My PL finished eating and left a bit of a soup in her bowl.
One would assume, it is there for doggie to finisih it of, right?
No decent human being could think of anything else, right?

So, I am getting ready to fulfil my dog duty and suddenly I notice CAT IS EATING IT!!!

Hey, it is NOT FAIR!!!!

Whatever is left on the table is there for little good doggies.
Look, how sad I am looking!

Well, to cut the long story short...
I didn´t get any soup.
I love my PL, but IT IS NOT FAIR!
I am going to sulk on the sofa.
There is someting on the table!
And CAT is eating it!
It was not for the doggie?

For good, little doggie?
It is not fair :-(
P.S. Maybe it seems I am complaining all the time. No true. I am just faitfully reporting the events. It was a beef broth in that bowl. So do not tell me, YOU would not go sulking on the sofa!


This is my bed I DID NOT sleep in!
My PL locked me out!

Actually, what happened was that the lock on our dog-door to the garden was turned into wrong position. Let me out, didn´t let me in.

I woke up in the middle of the night, thinking "Hey, I feel like going for a litle romp outside."

I got out as usual.

I sniffed around a bit.
Barked at some cats, which weren´t there, but could have been!

Then I casually strolled back, easy peasy...WHAT THE HELL?!!
I probed the dog-door with a snout...nothing.
I smack it with a effect at all!

The door did not open
Nobody heard me.

I spent long and lonely night on the porch.
All alone, forgotten.
Poor abandoned doggy.

Curled under the roof, on the double folded feather blanket.
Under which there is a thick mattress.

All right, all right, it was warm and comfortable and cosy...
the point is I wanted to go HOME to join my pack!

My PL was extremely apologetic in the morning, when she discovered me outside, although she spoilt it a bit by pointing out it was actually my own fault.
If I hadn´t gobbled that awful shit yesterday, there was no need to shut the dog-door and she would not have made that mistake when opening them again for one-side traffic only.

Shame on you, my beloved PL, how can you blame the victim! Surely, that is a very poor taste!

Anyway, I will stay inside on my dog bed, even if dozens of cats are mating right on the poorch tonight!

Monday, 4 May 2015


Or - as we say in Czech - I am under the dog.

I found something really disgusting at the garden.

I ate it.

I womitted all over the living room floor.

Now I am banned from the garden.

Life is terrible.

Going to sleep it of.


Sunday, 3 May 2015


I am simply a romantic soul.
When I see the nature!
The warm spring air!
The daffodils!

I just cannot help myself.

The person on the ground has to be LICKED, LICKED, LICKED!!!!

Saturday, 2 May 2015


So, we went to Pack Land again.

And I can tell you, it was a torture!
So many tasty things around!
So much FOOD!!!

And do you think they gave me some?!
I was reduced to GRAZING GRASS!
I had to munch POTATO PEELINGS just to survive!

I applied my well developed look of a poor little hungry doggy.
Didn't work.
My PL has very tough friends.

So, I had no other choice but to take my fate into my own hands. Paws.

I ate a few not guarded muffins.
I overturned not guarded plate of chops.
(It was a sad moment since they snatched the chops! On the bright side, I poured the grease all over me and had a wonderful time licking it of. I was so tasty! I was GORGEOUS!

I ate two halves of two dinners of two PL's friends. They should have guarded them better. Their fault.
I washed countless plates.

Just between us - do you know that empty cheese package which was found under the sofa? Well,  initially it wasn't empty! Now it is.

Simply, I did my best!

I admit, I got a breakfest everyday. And snack. And lunch. And dinner. But it hardly counts. Do you know how much running there is around the Pack Land?
You just really build a healthy appetite, none can blame for that :-)

Besides, it was GREAT!!!

Do you happen to have some food, Sir?
Dotty is just excited, no matter what